How Nursery Rhymes Ruined my Life!

When I was little, I learnt nursery rhymes like any other kid. I would sing them along with my classmates and it was all funny... until I started thinking about them!

Each nursery rhyme left me with a psychological scar which I haven't been able to out-live, until now. I will explain what each scar was and which nursery rhyme gave it to me. It is quite terrible, I don't know why I decided to think about it, or why other children don't go through this, but I was not having any of this 'Nursery Rhymes?' or should I say 'Death Poems!'

So, the first one I learnt was 'Humpty Dumpty':

Haha, he falls off a wall and is never the same again... so funny. I think this teaches us one lesson... don't climb on walls! You will fall and the king's men won't be able to put you back again! From this, I would never climb up a wall again.... ever! Just in case I, well you know, fell like my friend Humpty.

The next nursery rhyme that ruined my life, is 'Itsy Bitsy Spider':

This spider was just going about his day and then the rain came and washed the spider out! He could only climb up again when the Sun came out... I'm surprised he didn't die, the way he got washed out! After that I was never able to go out when it was raining, just in case I got washed out. It was quite traumatic and made me extremely conscious  about checking the weather report before I stepped my foot out the door, you can understand why this would ruin a kid's life!

The next nursery rhyme I learned was 'Little Miss Muffet'. This seems like a nice one as you going through it, but then the end comes:

The end comes when the spider comes, but Miss Muffet runs away! I wasn't scared of spiders until I heard this nursery rhyme. Why did she run away? Was it a killer spider? A gigantic spider? Did the spider say something nasty to her? Well... I don't know so after that I didn't want to take a chance with spiders, so after that every time I saw a spider, I ran away just like 'Miss Muffet'. 

The last nursery rhyme I learnt was 'Jack and Jill'. Again, at first this seemed like a nice one... until the end:

Was I going to break my crown if I climbed up a hill? Was I going to tumble down? What would happen? I didn't know... and was not going to just go playing on a hill after that! So, I would just stand at the bottom of the hill, while my friends were rolling down it, or sitting on it, or purely just going up to fetch a pail of water. 

So after learning all of these, you can understand why each rhyme negatively affected my childhood. When I was surrounded my each of these life-threatening things, in these environments, I wasn't care free like everyone else. I was like a warrior of the rhyme, battling against each enemy (hill, spider etc) in an attempt not to die! 

So, now you can understand why it wasn't good for me to learn these 'light-hearted' rhymes  death poems and that they ruined my life! 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' is a real nursery rhyme!